Decluttering
It all started after the wedding. To be precise, right after I got my new passport. They say a woman’s destiny changes when she takes her husband’s last name. This is exactly what happened to me. The apartment we rented at the time had already been furnished and, sadly, hugely cluttered with the owner’s possessions. An old lady used to live there, and the place was filled with all sorts of random “grandma” stuff. It was kind of a challenge to fit in all of my own stuff, which I had a lot back then. Clutter made it difficult to keep the place clean and tidy. Soon I realized I couldn’t catch up with all the housework. Luckily, that was right when I stumbled upon a video on YouTube about minimalism and instantly thought, “This is what I need.” I figured that with less stuff I would spend less time on housework. Inspired, I started decluttering. Little did I know back then that my purely pragmatic interest in minimalism would be so beneficial. I instantly liked decluttering. Letting go of my stuff felt right, and I could see how spacious our place was becoming. Every morning I would wake up excited for my next decluttering session. My husband would go to work and I would stay at home, have my morning coffee, and write down my thoughts on decluttering. The habit of writing down all my feelings and insights helped me analyze and understand the process of letting go of material possessions.
The state of the apartment we lived in was rather sad. Realtors call these apartments granny style. It wasn’t just old-fashioned but also rather abandoned-looking. Cleaning was definitely not a priority for ex-renters. I’d never seen a greasier kitchen in my entire life. That was the strongest cleaning motivation for me. I would take breaks from decluttering in order to clean up the place. I just couldn’t function in a place like that. Little by little, I was able to see some progress. Sure, the place was far from being aesthetically pleasing, but I knew for a fact that I could at least make it clean and tidy. “A cozy little nest for the newlyweds” — this was my goal that kept me moving forward.
While purging my things, I decided to refer to all the items I didn’t use as clutter. I believe that it’s best to get rid of an unused item, even if it is in great condition, because I spend my energy on it. Things that I don’t use also need my attention because they occupy physical space in my home. Dust sets on them, and I need to move them in order to wipe them down. They don’t fulfill their designated purpose of serving me but still consume my energy when I take care of them. Once I realized that the time I “killed” on such items is gone, and no one would give it back to me, I became a ruthless “decluterer”.
I think that decluttering is a very personal process, and advice is not appropriate here, so I would like to simply share my story and, hopefully, inspire you to start decluttering as well.
When I started decluttering, I had a vague idea of the final result. All I knew was that I wanted lightness, cleanliness, and space around me. I dreamed of tidiness and order not only around me but also in my soul. “Clutter is bringing us down,” said my friend when I told her about my decluttering experience. Her words perfectly described the state I was in — lost and surrounded by the stuff that I didn’t really like or use. Moreover, I had a negative self-image. All the great goals I had set for myself were put on hold. I knew I had to break through that clutter and leave it behind me in order to move forward. I needed to organize my stuff. And my head.
I would declutter non-stop for weeks, then I would take a break, and start again. With every “set” I was learning new sides of myself. It was interesting and daunting at the same time. With every decluttered item I was adding new traits to my real self-portrait, and I was really surprised when I was done. I wasn’t the person I thought I was.
Clothes
It took me a while to figure out my style. Through decluttering I had a few insights that completely changed my approach to choosing clothes. Now I know for sure which item I should pick when at the store. I feel so lucky I was able to do it intuitively by decluttering. I went through my wardrobe and took a close look at every item. Regarding color, I realized that neutrals look really flattering on me as well as clothes with a delicate pattern. On the other hand, bright colors look too overbearing on me. Wearing bright feels as if I’m the frame and my clothing is the picture. And this isn’t something I aim towards when getting dressed for the day. Bright colors take all the attention because my face features are not very strongly pronounced, and my skin undertone is cool. In other words, I look very pale and plain wearing bright clothing. However, I’ve noticed that I can pull off wearing bright if I do a smokey eye. I realized this one morning when I saw myself in a mirror wearing a bright house dress (which I had picked up the day before that when I had a full face of make-up). Most of the time, I wear natural make-up, so I would like for my clothing to accentuate my facial features without pulling the attention away from myself to the clothing. Sometimes I still get questions like “Don’t you own a bright colored dress?!” As if I’m supposed to because it’s every girl’s wardrobe must-have. I don’t think so. Not anymore. Now I’m confident wearing my clothes because I choose what suits me. In the process of decluttering, I made a pile of clothes titled “every girl should own”. This was the category which brought me a lot of suffering because in that pile were my hopes and efforts to fit in, to seem cool. Being confident in choosing my clothing gave me momentum to build my confiden
